While on the plane today, my sister and I were talking about certain fears.
"Do you know why some people keep the tap on while they brush their teeth?"
"Hmm...."
"I was thinking about it last night. Initially, I thought it was
because they are afraid that the water might somehow run out and
therefore the current stream of running water might have been some
sort of an assurance. Then I thought, no it's because they are afraid
of not being able to rinse out the toothpaste from their mouth the
very minute they are done."
"....ok."
It is not a revelation, pure laziness could explain the whole tap
running thing, it could explain a lot of things I suppose, but let's
not get lazy and take it for more than it should be credited.
Has it been worth the wait? Could I have found the answers earlier? I
had people asking me how I did it, why I could have done it, one even
asked if I knew I was worth the wait. I'm not a magician, and as you
already know, I don't have all the answers to everything I do. It
could have been a complete failure, another 2 hour long music program,
just another concert to dole out just because it was about time to
refresh everyone's memory and rinse that stale taste from the mouth.
But it wasn't just that. It was about letting the sting fester and
scab, and then nipping it in the bud even when there were no clear
answers, no map, no end in sight. It was about taking it up, gathering
your nerves and believing in your power to control a destiny. It was a
great battle, thank you for giving me the chance to fight. I can sleep
like a pig now.
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.
Translation courtesy of someone:
300 個睡意...
各位晚安
今天在飛機上，我跟我姐討論有關恐懼的問題。
「你知道為何有些人喜歡一邊開著水龍頭一邊刷牙嗎?」
「嗯..」
「我昨天在想這個問題。起初想因為他們怕突然沒水出來，所以長長流水能給予一點點安全感。後來我想，是因為他們怕快刷好的時候剛好沒水，牙膏沒法沖走。」
「...嗯，是吧。」
這並不是一項啟示，基本上懶惰就能解釋一切。我想它還可以解釋很多事哩。
這是值得等待的嗎? 我已經找到答案了嗎? 有人問我怎樣完成它的，為什麼要這樣做，有人甚至問我，我覺得自己值得讓大家等待的嗎。
我不是魔術師，你們都已經知道，我對很多事情還是沒有答案。它有可能是一個完全失敗的表演，只不過是一個兩小時的音樂節目，或者另一個為辦而辦的演唱會，只因為太久沒出來，是時候讓大家記得我，讓待久了的口腔有機會漱一漱。
但，其實並不只是這樣的。這讓我的傷口化膿然後結疤，然後碰觸一下膿頭，發現還是沒有明確的答案，沒有路線、地圖，前面也沒有盡頭。這也是指我又開始，集中棈神，相信自己能夠控制命運。這是一場漂亮的杖，謝謝大家給我這個機會。我現在可以睡得像死豬了。
ps.300Zs應該是雙關語，據側面了解
台灣姿迷在送機時對燕姿大喊:「THIS IS STEFANIE!」(改編自電影300壯士)
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